Addictions are hard.
How do I know this? Because I have an addiction (two actually, if you include
regular spending at Ross). In all seriousness, I am addicted to food. Some of
you are laughing as you read this. Others are nodding your head and saying, “yes,
girl, I know what you mean.” For those of you who are on the same page as me
you know that the thought of food can consume your mind. Someone mentions the
weather: “It’s chilly out” and you’re thinking about a crockpot full of chili
with shredded cheese and sour cream and those little Frito scoops and…(see!).
Or you go to work and see someone else’s lunch and wonder to yourself if they
will really notice if a little bit is missing…addicted.
I started a new diet on February 13th which
basically cuts out all carbs, sugars, starches, etc. So basically I eat
unlimited protein & veggies and eat a minimal amount of probiotics (yogurt,
etc) and low-carb fruit. I know that I have an addiction to food now because I
have thought of nothing else!
Yesterday, there were two low points:
The first was when I actually said
aloud to myself as I drove home from work, “well, now I can’t have a good day. How
am I supposed to be happy now?” (this was after I thought about how I missed my
friend “the spaghetti”). Yes, a very low point. I realized that food was my
driving force for happiness! What?! And, yet I sing praise songs about how
Jesus is all I need. Pathetic, right? Well, this is one area that I’m going to
work on. The second low point was
when my husband had to chase (yes, chase!) me around the house because I had
one of the kids’ Totinos pizza rolls in my mouth and I was threatening to eat
it! Thank God my husband is committed to our marriage because surely he should
have left me due to this psychotic behavior! 
Anyway, I say all of this to tell you all that I believe
with all my heart that Satan will use whatever area of life he can (even our
love of cream cheese and garlic bread and mexicorn casserole and…(agh! Stop
it!)) to take control of us. Anything to get our focus off of our Lord. So, at
least I’m not in denial anymore, right?! Today is Day 3 and already I want to
reach for the cookies I’ve hidden in the office break room. But, I’m going to “pray
myself through it” and suck down a lot of coffee! I’d also like to ask for any
of you to help keep me accountable – if you see me with sugary stuff or anything
that’s not a vegetable or lean protein just walk right up to me and smack it
out of my hand! Yep, you have my permission! Thanks for reading…
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