Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire

Sammy's Latest

Sammy and I have an after-school routine. We come home, get a snack, and do homework. While I was opening his book bag, I noticed there were HUGE slashes taken out of the fabric between the front and middle zipper part (see pic to the right). So, I asked him what happened...And do you know what my sweet, innocent, beautiful baby boy did? He came up with a genius lie. He told me that another boy in his class was being mean to him and cut a huge hole in his book bag (he knew this would break my heart and send me into a fury - of course diverting the attention away from him - but I was on to him). So, I looked at him again and asked, "Sammy, are you telling Mommy the truth?" Of course, the SECOND answer was the truth. He cut his book bag. To him, he was simply making an easier route into his book bag so he wouldn't have to use the zippers if he wanted to get to his folder.

So, two topics were discussed that night: laziness and lying. Not many things will result in a spanking for Sammy. But us McCall's take lying very seriously (because God takes it very seriously according to the Bible - see proverbs 12:22 and others). Sammy got a warning over the cuts in the book bag since this was his first time mutilizing (mutilating?) something he owns. And, this time, for some reason, I didn't feel I should spank him over the lie. I felt like we needed to have a deeper discussion over this.

For those who have heard me pray, you know I usually end my prayer with "forgive us of our sins. amen." After I said a goodnight prayer with Sammy, I asked him if he thought he sinned that day. He glanced to the side, made a teeter motion with his hand, and nonshalantly said, "eh, maybe a little." I asked him to be specific and he agreed that lying was a sin. So, I asked him to confess his sin to God. I really expected a half-hearted prayer or a rebuttal or a plea for me to do it for him. But he immediately closed his eyes, got into "prayer position" like the Precious Moments dolls with their prayer hands held tightly to their chin, and quietly BEGGED the Lord to forgive him. It went something like, "PLEASE, forgive me, Jesus. PLEASE, forgive me, Jesus." I asked him if he meant it with all his heart. He said he did. And we both knew that he was forgiven. He smiled and turned over and went to sleep. (talk about a heart breaker - what a kid)

Listen, moms and dads. I know your precious angels can do no wrong. After all, they are born innocent, right? WRONG! The Bible says that we are sinners from childhood. In Genesis 8: 21 God tells Noah that "the intent of man's heart is evil from his youth." I believe this is true because you don't have to teach a child to lie or be hurtful or disobedient. Look at Adam and Eve's example - they certainly didn't have an example of disobedience to follow - they walked with God! But, we have are born into an evil world and possess evil in our hearts from childhood, which is why it's so important to "train up a child" according to the Bible. Boy, is it hard! Boy, does it expose MY sin daily! But, boy is it rewarding when I see my six-year-old begging for Jesus' forgiveness over lying about cutting his book bag and I have probably broken Jesus' heart in far worse ways and far many more times that day. Wow - the lessons learned each day during "Hugs, Kisses, and Prayers."

How NOT To Shop From Scratch...

There's nothing worse than creating a grocery shopping list from scratch each week. So, I decided to create a master list of "keep in stock" items so that as these particular items go on sale at Publix or Target (remember, I'm boycotting Walmart), I can pick them up and always have what the majority of the family wants to eat. These are the categories I came up with:

- Breakfast

- Sammy's School Lunches

- Snacks

- On the Go (this category + leftovers will make up lunches for me and Matt)

- Dinners & Leftovers

- Pantry Staples

Step 1 was to ask the family what foods they like and don't like (the boys are the pickiest!)

Step 2 was choosing items from their lists that are located in the "outer aisle" of the grocery store, which is supposedly the healthier items to eat.

So, here are some examples of our "keep in stock" items:

Breakfast: Yogurt, Fruit, Hash Browns, Peanut Butter Toast, Bakery Muffins

Sammy's School Lunches: String Cheese, Fruit, Pizza Lunchables, Frozen PB&J Crustables

Snacks: Yogurt, Fruit, Cheese/Crackers

On the Go: Pre-made Salads, Homemade "Sandwich Kits"(like lunch meat w/condiments, etc)

Dinners & Leftovers: My plan here is to make double portions and immediately pack leftovers before eating (this will also eliminate me going back for seconds); Of course I also had to a few have "Dinner Categories":

   "Mystery Mondays" (maybe not the best name - reminds me of a school cafeteria) - but this is where I get to pick a new recipe for the family to try and this is my "keep it fresh" outlet so I don't get bored making the same dinners

   "Soupy Sundays" - basically a crockpot soup or stew we can eat immediately after church and throughout the rest of the day (also great leftovers for Monday)

   "Family Favorite Fridays" - this will most likely be pizza night or something fun for the kids

   "Traditional Tuesdays & Thursdays" - these are the weekly repeats that everyone loves (i.e. Chicken Casserole, Cheesy Rice and Chicken, etc.)

Pantry Staples: various Campbell's cooking soups, Potatoes, Rice, Canned Tomatoes and Sauces, Favorite Dinner Ingredients, Frozen Veggies, etc.

I know this seems to take a lot of time and organization but isn't it also true that the most stressful decision of the day is what to make for dinner? At least this way you will always have the majority of what you need in stock at your house and your weekly grocery trip will become quick sale pickups and fresh items (like fruit, meat, and veggies).

I don't know - thoughts from anyone else on what helps you and your kitchen sanity?

Decisions, Decisions

Don't you sometimes wish that you could ask God a question and receive an immediate answer? Like, "God, what should we have for dinner?" and immediately you get a thunderous reply with a well-planned, healthy, money-saving meal the whole family will love! Ok, maybe not...

I think we all have a hard time "waiting on the Lord" or "just praying about it" or even trying to make decisions on our own (and that just doesn't work). I mean, really, when does ANYONE give you a straight answer anymore? It takes me an hour to get an answer out of my husband about a detail as minute as what time he'll be home...It usually goes something like this:

Me: "Hey, what time will you be home?"

Him: "Well, I have to finish a few things here and then I have to wrap up a few things there."

Me: "Ok" (as if the first time I asked wasn't clear enough)"What time will you be home?"

Him: "I guess when I'm done with all that."

Me: (really?!) "Ok, well, how long until all that's done?"

Him: "I don't know a little while longer so I'll be leaving here soon."

Me: (defeated) "ok"

The moral of the story is - everyone wants an immediate answer all the time. Should I accept this position? Should I sell my house? Should I go back to school? Should I buy a cat? Should I...should I...should I...? And, in most of these cases, we want a straight "yes" or "no" answer. But as I've recently learned in starting a 7-day study on "Decisions" (with my awesome Bible app), the decision-making process is important in the growth of the personal relationship between us and Christ. So, on a serious note, I'm realizing I don't have decision-making issues. I can tell people what to do all day long (and most of you who work close with me know this to be true)! What I'm learning is that when we allow God to be a part of our decision-making process and when we submit to His will over our own, we are extending Him our trust and submitting ourselves to whatever HE decides, which is always going to be the best for us (scratch that) - the best for His glory. 

Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." 

So, after I read this, I decided to do things a bit differently to try and make this short passage sink in. I flipped it entirely into a series of questions pointed directly at me...

"Crystal, do you trust in the Lord with all your heart? Crystal, do you lean on your own understanding or the way the Almighty understands it? Crystal, are you fully submitting yourself to His will and trusting that He works all things to the good of your life? And, Crystal, do you believe He's mighty enough to send you in the right direction?"

Whoa - so this was a wake up call for me - at least in how I viewed God when it came to making decisions in my life - big or small. Before reading this, my mindset was "well, I know what I think I want to do but I need God to affirm it - yes, let me read some scripture, twist it into something that affirms what I already feel and call it a Godly decision." (uh-uh) God already has a path for me to take. God already knows His will for creating me - His purpose for my existence. So, all I have to do is submit to it and trust Him.

Is it easy? Nope. Is the answer going to pop out of thin air when I want it to? Nope. Will planning family meals become any easier? Probably never. Will I ever really know what time my husband is coming home? I don't know. But I do know if I allow Christ to be the center of my decision-making, at least I know that I'll always be moving in the right direction.

Jedi Kittens

Just a peek into the lives of the McCall boys and what they love...Star Wars...anything Star Wars...yes, even Jedi Kittens...(click the link and enjoy)

Jedi Kittens

A Blog About My Blog

So, I changed the look and title of my blog - the look because I get bored easily and I was sick of it, and the title because a new idea for a title struck me this morning as I dropped Sammy off at school...

Since the beginning of this academic year, I have taken Sammy to school 99.9% of the time so we have developed a daily drop-off routine. We get in the back of the longest line ever known to man, I put on my makeup while Sammy eats breakfast in the back seat, we rock out to either Way FM or the Christmas at Northwood CD, and then we reach a certain point in our route where he is allowed to unbuckle so he can get his things together and is ready to be helped out of the car.

A few months back, I started saying a prayer with him each day just before letting him out of the car. Then we hug, kiss, and out he goes (taking my heart along with him). Just a few days ago, my mind was going a mile a minute and we were approaching the drop off point. I had YET to say our prayer and was probably going to forget, so Sammy leans forward between the front two seats and says, "Mommy...hugs, kisses, and prayers"...something that I will always remember. I didn't realize how much this small moment meant to him - and to me! So, of course, when he said it today, it hit me! That sums up our life in three words - Hugs, Kisses, Prayers...Then I realized this has always been tradition in my family growing up. Even now, I will pick up the kids from my parents and dad will always say a prayer before we go - short, simple, doesn't matter, always a blessing before we go. Little things that I grew up with and am glad I am imparting on my kids.

So there you have it - the reason for the new look and the new title - thought I'd share...

F.A.I.L.

Just when I think I have this whole "mommy thing" figured out, one of my sweet darlings sends a jab my way. While going over Maddie's AWANA lesson, Sammy walks in and asks, "Mommy, do you wish you would have only had one child?" After I picked my jaw up off the floor, I immediately answered "of course not! I am so thankful for both of you. Why would you think that?" He replied, "well, sometimes I think you can't handle a lot of us." After this second blow, he quickly moved on to jumping on Maddie's bed so I decided to let the comment go - but, for anyone who truly knows me and my heart, I don't let these comments go. My #2 strength on the 5.0 Strength Finders assessment (after "Woo") is "Harmony" - so I naturally want to "fix" things - whether they are arguments or hurt feelings or misunderstandings. I don't like to let things go unresolved - thus, the harmony part of me. This was not over...

So, while tucking Sammy in to bed I figured it was time to approach the issue. (Maybe I wasn't ready to hear what he had to say, but I couldn't go on wondering what thoughts were running around in my son's head regarding his mommy). I told him that his comment upset me because I wanted him to know how much I cared for them both. He got very quiet, a little teary-eyed, and said, "Mommy, you tell me to 'hold on' a lot." [To catch you up, they just got home from their grandparents and both kids were going a mile a minute and trying to fill me in on their evening - all while I'm trying to talk with my mom and get their things in order - so yes, they heard "hold on" a lot from me this evening...]

Ok moms, we've all used this phrase before...
"Mom!" (hold on) "Mommy, I want..." (hold on) "Mom, can I have..." (hold on) "Mom, mom, mom, mom, ma, ma, mother, ma, mom" (what?!) "Hi" 
[sorry, couldn't resist using this "Family Guy" reference (and for the record I hate this show with a passion)]. 

Anyway, my point is, I spend so much time doing so many other things to try and be super mom and all the while a simple phrase like "hold on" makes my child think he's not wanted. Now, I will say that if I stopped and acknowledged my children EVERY time they said "mommy" I wouldn't be able to take two steps or carry on a two-word conversation. But I'm going to try harder at being more patient (this is a virtue I know I do NOT possess). 

I'm glad that Sammy can be honest with me. And I'm glad for forgiveness and daily mercy...from both my family and my Lord and Savior. Without these things I would already be a failure. I'm also glad that the Holy Spirit uses my sweet little boy to slap me upside the head every now and then. I'm definitely looking deeper at myself tonight - they're so worth every bit of effort I can put forth. That's all. Thought I'd share...

poor sick husbands

I will stop to help a dog. I will sooth a crying child. I will cry over a wounded bird. I pity the kids who are made fun of. I care about the hungry and needy. I generally love all people. BUT...for some reason, I do NOT like taking care of a sick husband. Now, please understand, I WANT to like taking care of him. I WANT to want to "baby" him and "mother" him and be the ultimate loving, caring wife. I even give myself pep talks throughout the day ("c'mon, Crystal, just ask him if he needs anything" or "try, Crystal, try to say something caring without seeming like you don't want to")...You think I'm joking. I am not. And, I know lots of other women out there with this sickness too! And they will all agree, they will take care of a sick baby, a sick toddler, a sick teenager, and a sick dog but cringe at the idea of taking care of their husbands.

WHY?!
Here's the only thing I can come up with...#1 - It shows their weakness - something about a man laying on the couch sniffling makes me immediately realize that our grass looks longer and the trash can looks fuller...#2 - It means there's an extra body I need to care for - for do-it-all-moms this comment is self-explanatory...and #3 - The 'ol "I don't get to rest when I'm sick so suck it up" thought that creeps in your mind as he "must" lay there resting.



Here's the REAL reason...
I, like everyone else, am a sinner. By nature I'm selfish. There's nothing inside me that is good. I cannot be the awesome, caring, loving, helpful wife that I want to be on my own. The great news, however, is that I'm not alone and that I CAN learn to have the qualities I desire to have as a wife (and the qualities I'm sure he's desiring that I have while he lays on the couch with no pity from me). I do this by trying to stay in the Word as much as possible. It's amazing how reading the Bible more often will keep you "in check" and it's great because who else is better to do so than the Father? I also do this by praying constantly ("Lord, please let me be nice, please don't let me throw his blanket at him hard, please don't let my face twitch when he asks me for his pillow...") and always trying to stay thankful (after all, my husband is one of my biggest blessings and it should be an honor to be able to care for him when he's sick).

[Colossians 4:2 "Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful."]

I'll end by saying that I believe some women are better care givers than others - those are the types of women who become nurses and full-time stay-at-home mothers and social workers and pediatricians and so on. But me...I'm just a wanna be. BUT...at least I wanna be...right? I'm trying, Matt McCall. I hope you feel better soon...love you, mean it!